“The Snozzberries Taste Like Snozzberries” Is Actually A Dirty Joke
Michaels ruined another one of everybody's favorite things today - showing Willy Wonka in a creepier light.
In the classic scene from the movie, where they're all trying out the candy factory's new Lickable Wallpaper, Wonka tells them whatever they lick, is what they'll taste.
"Lick an orange. It tastes like an orange. The strawberries taste like strawberries! The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!"
Veruca Salt turns around and says "Snozzberry? Who ever heard of a snozzberry?" and we all laugh because there's no such thing as a snozzberry, it's just some made up fruit for the movie, right?
"Lick an orange. It tastes like an orange. The strawberries taste like strawberries! The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!"
WRONG!
The term "snozzberry" was only used in Willy Wonka, until 1979, when Roal Dahl revisited the word in a very different light, in My Uncle Oswald.
The equally witty, albeit gross and disgusting, story follows a character named Oswald Hendryks Cornelius, who is known to be the "greatest fornicator of all time."
Basically, he and his accomplice, the sexy Yasmin Howcomely come up with a scheme where she sleeps with rich and famous guys, then they would sell the used condoms to women wanting to give birth to the rich and famous people's children.
Right about on par for the guy known for writing some of history's greatest children's stories.
Snozzberry is revisited in this book when Yasmin tells Oswald about her time with George Bernard Shaw.
"How did you manage to roll the old rubbery thing on him?"
"There's only one way when they get violent," Yasmin said. "I grabbed hold of his snozzberry and hung onto it like grim death and gave it a twist or two to make him hold still."
"Ow."
"Very effective."
"I'll bet it is."
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was released 15 years before, in 1964, before My Uncle Oswald revealed to the world that the wallpaper Wonka made the kids taste was flavored like dick.
At the very least, it ruins the rest of the movie for you, because just about any line from the movie no longer sounds as innocent as it did.
Here's a few ruined out-of-context lines.
“It happens every time, they all become blueberries.”
“Little surprises around every corner, but nothing dangerous.”
And perhaps the most damning quote of all:
“Because that pipe doesn’t go to the marshmallow room, it goes to the fudge room!”
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