There's an old saying, "Pizza is pizza, you can't really screw it up". That is the biggest lie I think any one person has ever told. As a Chicago native who's entire diet consisted around bread, sauce and cheese, I can tell you that not all pizza is created equally. Pizza and people are very similar if you think about it. Some are great, most are just alright, and some... are very, very bad. I believe it is my job to inform you of the dangers of bad pizza. The pizza police if you will. Here are the worst pizza combinations I've ever seen.

1). Kiwi Pizza- Fruit and pizza don't mesh. Outside of the controversial pineapple, mst fruit can remain as a side dish or in the fridge where it belongs. Kiwi on pizza isn't just wrong, it's sacrilegious.

2). Mayo and Pea Pizza- Ok, hear me out. I understand the appeal of new combinations, but this is just disrespectful, inappropriate and (quoting the great Key & Peele) "churlish".

3). Rainbow Pizza- No. Just no.

4). Peeps Pizza- WHY? Peeps aren't even good on their own! This has "I was drunk at 4am" written all over it.